A relationship is based on various facets such as trust, respect, and loyalty, among others. In order to maintain healthy relationships, both people involved have to put in the effort. The phrase ‘put in efforts’ sounds familiar right? While its interpretation is subjective, it is crucial for your bond to survive. Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders has tried to simplify this for you so that you understand what this means for your relationship.

Emily said that given the needs of every individual and notions of partnership that vary. “It is important to ask your partner what they are specifically asking for when they request that you ‘put more effort into the relationship’.” Further, she noted a few points that can be possible signs a person is investing in the health of their partnership.

First, Emily said that a sign of effort is if a person is working on personal growth. We continue to develop as individuals even when we are in a relationship. Being a better person might sometimes make us better for our partner. Therefore, looking after your well-being is important. Next, if an individual is making it their habit to share what is on their mind and what is happening in their lives. This point stresses the importance of communication in a relationship.

Another healthy sign is if your partner is sharing your workload or is equally invested in parenting. It goes on to show that they value you as equals and that a particular task is just your responsibility. If your partner is involved in your plans and is actively offering opinions, going through research, etc, it shows they are invested in what you do and are supportive.

A crucial sign is if they are owning up to their faults when there is a falling out or misunderstanding. While everyone is ready to blame others, a partner who accepts their mistakes values you and the relationship.

Another point mentioned by Emily is that if your partner is spending time with you and is not easily distracted, it is an expression of their love and effort. Additionally, if they are also initiating physical intimacy.

Moving on, if your partner is making thoughtful gestures that are important to you, that is a sign enough that they care about your needs and desires. Complimenting their partner can never be underestimated. More often than not, it makes them feel good about themselves and keeps insecurities at bay.

While these are some points noted by the therapist, they are the very basis of how strong your relationship is.

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